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foggy skies and a full moon

Today I come to you with a heavy heart. I haven't been able to write for a while which seems like a common issue in my schedule these last few months. However, I am here now and I'm ready to unload some important thoughts and experiences.

To begin, I will give you the DL on my life. I sit here writing to you at 8:47 p.m. on a Friday evening (my last Friday of Summer), I am at my local Starbucks, and I am listening to my Frank Sinatra Pandora radio station. This is the epitome of my Summer. Now don't go getting the wrong idea..I have had an amazing, wonder-filled Summer and I do not regret one second of it. But here I am: relaxing, writing, and drinking my coffee (a hot mocha, the usual) all by myself. I am not saddened by this fact, more so at peace in the sense that I am finally happy enough to be able to spend an evening enjoying some peace and quiet time. I have discovered myself this Summer. I know who I am and I know who I want to be. I want others to know about me and understand that I am who I am, and I am content. I am happy and I am enjoying my life one day at a time. I used to get overwhelmed by life, but now I find myself being more calm and at ease with what life decides to throw at me. I have also realized that if ever I thought I was normal or perfect in any sense of the word, I am not. No one is, I don't think. It's actually somewhat settling to come to that conclusion. No one is perfect so it's okay to stop trying to make others believe that you are. My new motto is to let go of the past, stop worrying about the future, and enjoy today. Live in the moment and stop trying to understand everything going on around you. We live in a constant cycle of uncertainty and unknown situations. I have accepted the fact that I will never be able to understand what is going on all of the time and it's okay because the second thing I've realized is that we aren't meant to. Life is beyond our boundaries. My advice to you is to accept the boundaries of your life, and know that in the end if you do the right thing and trust God with your life, then everything is all going to work out for you. You're going to look back at your life in five or ten years and be like "wow, I'm glad things worked out the way they did.." Ha, I sure hope I feel that way. I have already had the chance to look back at life and be happy that certain things worked out the way they did. Kinda nice to know that someone out there has your back.. People, relationships, life, some things have a way of working themselves out. Wow, I feel in awe as I look back over my high school years and think about how much I have changed. Growing up is scary, but every little memory and friendship, all the tears and the laughs, that is what makes your life unique. I smile as I write this to you, hopefully you are reminiscing along with me. "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get." -Forest Gump..hahaha I just had to(;
As I go into this new school year, I am happy as I remember how I used to be, but more happy to know how much I have grown and how much I will continue to grow as I get older. Lately, when discussing our futures, my friends and I have talked about how scary growing up is and how it has come so quickly, we wish we didn't have to grow up. But I've come to realize that there's nothing scary about growing older, it's just an adventure. Who doesn't love that, maybe that's what makes living life so exciting. You don't know what the future holds, but you know that whatever it may be, it must be something wonderful. The best is yet to come, and on that note I leave you. So long, my kind friends.

Until next time,

Madison
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